“How Are You?”
“I hope this letter finds YOU in pink of health…”
These were greetings we once used generously but now brushed off as conservative, old fashioned, and uncool.
But we no longer send handwritten letters anymore or do we? Electronic mail or e-mail (I bet you don’t even remember what the “e” stands for anymore) have replaced handwritten letters and greeting cards. We boast of how we “go green” by using e-mails and because it is far more instantaneous than the “snail mail”. Greeting cards section in souvenir stores have shrunk tremendously and post offices have almost halved the number of postmen.
Often times, we no longer end our letters/e-mails with “Yours sincerely” anymore but instead, it has since been replaced by a mere “Rgds” – short for Regards.
But abbreviations is not the intent of today’s post.
I would like to write about how disconnected the world is in this era where connectivity seemed to be readily available. We are so “connected” that we had become disconnected.
Social networking services and social medias that allow us to widen our so called social circles have reduced to nothing but channels that advocate, feed, and promote vanity, narcissism, and egotism.
How many of us are truly happy when a friend of ours posts something good that happened to his or her life?
You see, even something positive like good things happening to a friend can have a negative impact when we apply different perspective to it.
“She is going for her 5th vacation in 2 months! How can she possibly afford all the luxuries?”
We take at face value what our friends post and that feeling of envious slowly turns into self doubt and depression.
How often, that is you?
As if the negative news on the newspapers aren’t enough, social medias these days are filled with negative news and the endless braggings can be quite overwhelming.
And people these days assume that throwing parts of their lives out on social media implies and equates to reaching out to somebody.
“Oh you didn’t know? I posted about it two days ago”
Well not exactly…
To sum up my observation about social networking, it is truly a space for us to compare. We compare and trump each other by posting better and bigger food, frequent travels, and all sorts of events that earn us bragging rights.
What is the psychology behind such behavior exactly?
“Self Praise Is No Praise”
That is exactly what it is. Just because it would seem awkward to praise myself, I had to flaunt it for the world to see.
Plainly because the world at large is in need and it is deprived of AFFIRMATION and LOVE.
We no longer show our concerns for another person by just asking “How Are You Today?” but instead, jump right in or get straight to the point by asking for what we need for ourselves.
Over the past few months and weeks, we have lost many beautiful and talented people. These are famous people known throughout the world but it wasn’t until their passing that people started taking notice of all the good that they have done.
After reading through the tributes to the late Carrie Fisher (God bless her beautiful soul), I started thinking and wondering about the psychology behind the mind of a celebrity.
It must be a very contradictory life because in the entertainment industry, fame is needed to be successful. In order to obtain fame, one needs to attract attention. Once the attention is gone, people tend to forget and perhaps as a celebrity, one would feel lonely and abandoned. But my observation also tells me that celebrities do not yearn for the “paparazzi”, gossip or tabloid kind of attention. They seemed to feed on the attention of their fans.
That makes me believe that every celebrity yearns for the affirmation that they are really talented. And by knowing that they are genuinely gifted before leaving this world would allow them to be at peace and have eternal joy.
I guess social networking is similar in terms of more “likes” and “shares” for a post denotes the amount of attention one obtains. I sure hope I get more likes for this post because that would mean I could be famous writing random stuff!
But in all seriousness, we have been too sparing with our “I LOVE YOU”. We care about ourselves way too much just to take notice of the beautiful people around us. We have been very frugal with our acknowledgement when we see natural talents.
It does not matter if we are celebrities or otherwise, every person deserves some sense of belonging and to feel included.
Let’s make it simple and easy.
Let’s start with “Hello, how are YOU?”